Monday, May 11, 2009

Things that bring guys to tears (CONVO April 09)

2d eh ana far7ana! And I thought men were heartless. However when they're stripped off their muncho act, male ego and cultural pressure, their soft-core rises up like a phenox from the ashes. Don't get me wrong ana msh fr7ana fehom, God forbid, I'm just relieved. The whole men can cheat without feeling guilty is a rumor, the fact that they can move on in a blink of an eye is an anecdote and the no tears policy is just a cover for their frowned upon feminine sides. I asked the toughest men I know, what can make you cry? I promised complete anonymousness and I will deliver. Besides who cares about the names when the story is this good?!

There's always been this raw magnetism which attracted me to men who cry. Men who are strong, powerful and very much confident about their masculinity, that it's not a shame to cry. Girls can relate to what I'm saying here, Hercules is a hunk mafesh kalam but it's his humanitarian side and special moments that made him more than just an eye candy. I don't mean whiny men, God no, no one likes that. But it's comforting for a woman to feel that her man, her protector, her mountain, can understand her sorrow or her non-women drama, as one of the men puts it. That being said, let's scan men for their soft core…

1. Death
That was not much of a scoop here; I mean it's the accustomed answer.
Girl asks a guy: When was the last time you've cried?
Guy answers: mmm, when my grandma died, I guess.
It's the male-perfect explanation with which he escapes the risk of being heartless and he lands in the just right zone of not sounding too girlie. So, I had to dig deeper for the real deal…

2. Failure
Whether it's related to relationships, achievements, understanding oneself or money. Let's pause at the money part for a moment, men everywhere, not just in our culture, are providing-oriented, they're born producers not consumers. Thus, it's a real ball buster when the man feels that he can not provide. Things get even worse when the women in his life recognizes his failure. "I feel as if I'm not even man enough to give her what she deserves" one of the interviewee said. Failure strikes hard for both genders, but from the male point of view, the less people know about this low-point, the easier for a man to deal with. It all has to do with their caves and their refusal to share. So, they end up mourning their "ability to provide"

3. Injustice
"Part of being man is to be free," M. said. This is very true for one of the few things a mother would tell her daughter about men, which is similar to what John Gray named as the rubber band effect. Men need their spaces, they need to be left alone to think, work, act, decide before they come flying to their lives. Thus, more than women, should understand that, but they don't. Most men don't grant women the same pleasure and confine their choices, leading to injustice. For men, confining them is a killer, taking away their right to say no is soul sucking and having to stand helplessly while others are being subjected to injustice is manhood slaughtering. That's why many guys admitted that seeing poor, sick and dying people bring tears to their eyes. But unlike women, tears aren't coming from feeling sorry, but from the I can't do anything to help them side.

4. "WOMEN"
Yes! Now we're talking… The men crying because of women deal is a four-fold matter. According to my muncho men, they cry when they're:
a. Conquered: Recently, many people have been leaning on women who took the equality quarrel a bit too far and I'm one of them! To tell you the truth, I almost lost my man because of the whole women=men
crap. It took me a while to differentiate between equality and identical-ity. Someone must wear the pants in every relationship, it can't be both. If a woman chose to take the lead, then she'll be deprived from feeling like a woman, who's loved, approached and protected, the normal amount of course. And her man will feel lost! He's not a man in his relationship, he's not even a woman, he's just a human being. When men feel that way, decent men cry, not-so-decent men cheat! They go for the woman who can praise their ego and happily allow them to wear their much fitted pants.
b. Breaking-up: "I cried while writing a message to a girl that I got really attached to, and I had to leave for some specific reasons" O. confessed. Many men related to that and I was really pleased that for them love hurts for them too. But, one of them had to ruin it for me by saying " btw, the 2nd situation wasn't like I burst into tears or something, they were just a few drops (man's ego :D)" Arghhhhhhhhhhhhh
c. "When missing my girl": Now, that’s so cute, manly and says a lot about the effect women could have on men's lives if they're gone. To tell you a little something, it's not easy for a man to hand in his secrets to any woman, let alone his sweetheart who he needs to impress with his colored, flawless feathers.
d. Humiliation: Mockery is men's worst fears, especially when it's coming from the ones they're trying too hard to impress. There are certain things a woman should never tease a man about including height, physic, financial status and attitude. And this is an article I'm working on now, for, from men points of view it's not accepted to happen whether in private or in public or else, he'll go searching for someone who can appreciate his manhood.

5. And finally MOVIES!
S. said; "a7yanan bashoof regala keteer 3enehom bedama3 3ala mash-had drama fel tv, bas lama tewagheehom yenkeroo awy we ye2adoha de7k" With men confessing that they enjoy the occasional dramatic scenes in movies, but my own, whom I swear saw teary, but is still denying it! Balance has been restored to the universe and I still appreciate men who are peaceful with their emotions, 23teref ba2a… Walahi msh ha2oul l 7ad!


Abdelhalim Zeid said...

Very well done!

The idea and your style are amazing. That was a very interesting piece to read.

Keep up, Lobna.

marooned84 said...

I have something to add:

extremely funny situations/reads!

something else: books!

Anonymous said...

Whats up all, I just signed up on this terrific forum and wished to say hiya! Have a tremendous day!

Anonymous said...

Hi all,

it seems pretty cool here

hopefully i can participate in some lively discussions here!

i hope i get to know you all soon!


Anonymous said...


great forum lots of lovely people just what i need

hopefully this is just what im looking for looks like i have a lot to read.

Anonymous said...


It is my first time here. I just wanted to say hi!

Anonymous said...

Hey Guys! Just wanted to say hello to the new community :). Thanks for letting me in! :D

Anonymous said...

Remarkably! Thanks!

Anonymous said...