Monday, February 23, 2009

How to Pause, Stop and Delete an outdated relationship? (He Said She Said Magazine Jan'09)

The ordeal of poisoned hearts!
Relationships come in all different shapes and sizes; there are the ones that last for life, others that cause nothing but a swirl of torments and some that pass by anonymously without a trace! It’s in the second type where the heart finds its poison and anguish. You know it when you’ve given someone and the sake of being with her/him your best shot and ended up defeated in a battle you should have won and bathed in its glory. But as the wind always blows in the wrong direction, we are supposed to resist and find our own way to the right side. Those words are nicely said but hardly ever done. We need factual to implement and steps to follow to rise up from the heartache everyone is destined to experience. And so my dearly beloved, I hereby promise to provide you with nothing but 100% tested tips on how to rescue your poisoned heart, all of which have been tried humans before!

A. How to pause the existing relationship?Pausing your relationship is a very serious step, which is only meant to happen when you feel something’s not right about your love life.
To pause your relationship you have to:
1. Be frank with yourself about your needs and wants from any relationship you might embark.
2. Evaluate your current relationship as well as your partner and see if they both measure up to your essentials.
3. Take some time off from your partner; you need to try life on your own first in order test your feelings away from his/her spell.
Intermission: By following those steps, you have consulted both your heart and mind. Now it’s your call whether to continue with the relationship or move on to the next step and stop.
4. If the fact that you’re still reading is of any indication, I’d say that you decided to stop. But first you need to specify the reasons why you’re calling it quits and be serious about them. Meaning that no matter what, it’s impossible to give your needs up.

B. How to stop an overly done relationship?You made it perfectly clear that you want to end this relationship, but only to yourself! Now, comes the most difficult part, informing your partner about your firm decision.
To stop your relationship you have to:
1. Make a decision on where will the confrontations take place, at your home, at a café or over the phone!
2. Organize your thoughts and your reasons why you need this relationship to stop.
3. Listen to your partner defense, even if you’re mind is set, don’t ever deny her/him that right.
4. Never make a promise to stay friends because no matter how mature or conscious you are, you might fall for her/him again or worse! You might be giving your partner a false hope of winning you over. Accordingly, you’ll both need time to heal before you can be around each and not get hurt!

C. How to delete the outdated relationship?Stopping your relationship yourself doesn’t make it any less painful. Thus, like everyone else, you need to let go and move one.
To delete your relationship you have to:
1. Express your agony outwards not on yourself. Instead of weighting it on your nerves or health, put it out in words, in music, in drawing or even in sweating.
2. Embrace yourself. You are as much responsible for the failure of this relationship as your partner. Take this time to reflect on yourself and work on your negatives.
3. Focus on the bad sides of that relationship. I know it’s uncommon but learning that you’re better off without it makes the letting go hundred times easier.
4. Refuse to talk about it to people if talking doesn’t help heal your wounds.
And finally; adopt this slogan as your life motto; if you know your worth, never settle for less.


Anonymous said...

What a great resource!

Anonymous said...

i definitely adore your own posting kind, very exciting,
don't quit as well as keep creating considering the fact that it just that is worth to read it.
looking forward to browse through even more of your own writing, cheers!

Anonymous said...

Pretty Interesting publish. Couldnt be written any better. Reading this publish reminds me of my old room mate! He usually kept talking about this. I will forward this publish to him. Fairly certain he will have a great study. Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous said...

Nice advice